had a break-through last night
late, now I'm tired, so tired
trying to grasp the bits of truth
that we were talking about
trying to remember...

but today was just harder
harder and I feel more spent
and like a failure than before
Please send help.

wine and sushi
what I wanted tonight
what I wanted each night
to dull the pain, the ache
and feel human
feel like I get something
for this effort

where's mine?
where's my prize?
is this all there is?
wine and sushi?

wine and sushi
I won't say it doesn't help
and will continue to
in a small stupid way

I have to believe
there is more to this fight
than feeling some fleeting
food pleasure

but for now
it will be enough
for now
I will just say thank you
and eat it in silence
enjoying the silence
the blessed silence
when she isn't screaming